...okay, I'm really bad on the updates. Sorry about that. Though I had a good excuse last night. My dad came down with some serious back pain and was really ill, so at around nine my mom decided to take him to the hospital. Result? Kidney stones. Yeah. They got home at around one o'clock, and I figured it would be late, so I stayed up for them.
Dad slept most of the day. He's been quiet so I'm not entirely sure how well he's doing, but he's making an effort to get better. It was a big sleeping day for me too, got up around eleven o'clock. I'm glad college taught me about self-reliance because she needed the rest too.
Despite the tiredness factor, I've been feeling pretty good lately. Chatting with, and getting along with, people I'd never met whilst watching the Nuzlocke Livestream was a good experience, and certainly confidence-boosting. I have a feeling next year will be pretty good (and I just got my rooming assignment, I have two roommates. Should be interesting), especially if/when I got to London.
I was thinking about the girls who hurt me in the past, and how I thought I wasn't good enough for them. Then I turned it around: I can do better than them, but they can't do much better than me, not where it counts. And thinking that felt good.
When you lose everything that matters, if you're broken and bleeding on the ground, that's the worst time to give up. Keep fighting, and claw towards the future like your life depends on it, because it does. If you give up, then it was all pointless, but when you keep going, you can make things better, and only then will the suffering have been worth something.
I'm not weak because I fail. I'm strong because I keep trying. Sometimes people give up. I know, I've seen the results of people who surrendered everything. There's something different in me that keeps me going. I don't know what it is yet. I think I'll find out once I finally succeed.
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